This week I had a test of friendship. Let's just call this a venting session. I won't use names because I don't want them to get any backlash from others. But, if you're reading this and thinking, "hmmm, I think he's referring to me," then you're probably right. I'm still pissed off and that bugs the crap out of me that I'm letting you get to me this much. I guess I'm taking this a tad hard because I thought you were a friend, but I guess there was some information that I was missing. For all of you who don't know here's what happened...
I went out Friday night (12/16) with a couple of my friends (so they claim to be). Before we went out, they wanted to go shopping. I had my "me" day the day before, so I didn't need to go shopping that night. While they were shopping, you could feel the energy coming from them. They were pumped about Friday night. They went to a couple of stores to prepare for that night. Everyone decides to get dressed after we come back from shopping, and we decide to meet my friend's apartment. Let's call him Jacob (lol!). We all go back to our rooms to get dressed for the night. After meeting back at Jacob's apartment, we leave.
We get to the club early, so they let us in for free (awesomeness, I know.). It's dead, too, on account of it being so early, which we were all use to. We walk through the rooms and it's all the same music. We sit down to pass time, but nothing really happens. Again, we're used to this. Then, I hear "I think I'm about to go." ARE YOU SERIOUS?! We've barely been here an hour. Jacob asks me if my other friend is coming tonight. Let's call this friend...Brandon (he's going to hate me when/if he reads this). I go call Brandon to see if he's still coming, and then I go back to the table with Jacob and friend 2 whom I will name Jasmine.
Jasmine then says that she's leaving, too. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! Why would you get all dressed up and excited and stay only for an hour? I told them that Brandon said that he was coming. They both started to rise from the table to leave and saw the clear, vengeful look in my eyes. Then, Jacob asked me, "Are you mad?" Of course not, I'm okay. I'm ecstatic. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! Then, they start to rationalize why I shouldn't be mad. They actually called it payback for not wanting to on a weekend trip with them, but that's a blog post for another time. I stormed off quickly before I made a fool out of myself and the other two.
In my anger, I called one of my besties and talked through the anger. While on the phone with her, I started to feel fainty. But, I kept talking to Holley (that's her real name). I can feel my blood pressure rising. I was not to be messed with at this point. I even said (Mom, forgive me), "When I get back, shit is about to get real." She said that she had to go call some people but she'd be back. I went to go sit down. This is where I realized that no matter how much Lacoste cologne I had on, the only thing that emanated from me was this stench of bitch (Mom, forgive me again).
I had another spell where I almost passed out. I started to think what was going on with me. Am I going to die? Then, i started thinking, "what did I eat?" My conclusion...absolutely nothing. I had three drinks (strong ones, I might add) and nothing to absorb it. Luckily, Brandon had made it in time. I told him that I wasn't feeling good, but I wanted to stay a little longer, so that he would have a good time for awhile. Bad move, I could barely move when I was ready to go. It was a good thing he was on his way to come check on me. When we left, we went to IHOP, and I kid you not...this guy sat there and made me eat. I'm not seven, but I did feel like a kid. It was like having a parent stare at you while you're eating to make sure you eat everything.
He even made sure I made it to my room without passing out.
I really went through this week. All I know is that I'm still hurt that my so-called friends left when I could have passed out. It's a scary thought to pass out when you're alone and know no one around you. There's no telling what could have happened. I'm hurt and came close to crying over this. Am I being dramatic? Probably. But, I don't care. It's my blog and I can cry if I want to.
Just know that things will be different. Just know that I will be different.
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